The ABC's of Monty PythonA is for AlbatrossB is for BlackmailC is for Confuse a Cat, LimitedD is for Dead ParrotE is for Exploding version of 'Blue Danube'F is for Far too sillyG is for GumbysH is for Hungarian PhrasebookI is for It'sJ is for Jumping the ChannelK is for Ken Clean-Air SystemsL is for LumberjacksM is for Minister of Silly WalksN is for Nudge NudgeO is for One slice of strawberry tart without so much rat in itP is for Peaches BartkowiczQ is for Queen Erisabeth LR is for Royal Episode 13S is for Scotsman on a HorseT is for TerrysU is for Underwater playsV is for Vicar of St. Loony Up the Cream Bun and JamW is for Whizzo ButterX is for XimenethY is for You're no fun AnymoreZ is for Zepplin
From the North, Part 2CHAPTER FOUR~Over the next few weeks, Jacob could be seen patrolling the edge of the forest in front of the Cullens' home. My home, too, I guess. I could see in his face the lines of distress caused by the imminent arrival of more vampires--bloodsuckers as he called them.Mostly he spent his time in wolf form, shifting into human form and putting his pants back on only when Renesmee or Bella were about. There was something about Jacob and Renesmee's relationship that bothered me: The way he watched the skies and trees more closely whenever she was around made me think he might be more protective of her than need be; but I didn't hang outside with him much. Rarely, actually.Okay, never. The Cullens didn't let me out of the house. They wanted Jacob to be the first to know of the vampires' arrival and they did not want me there when they arrived. I couldn't have cared less about staying inside. It was fall and it was cold out. Not as cold as the Cullens' skin, but that's beside the poin
The Alphabet CapacitanceA is for AntarcticaB is for Bazinga!C is for Comic-ConD is for DoctorsE is for ElevatorF is for Five Mississippi'sG is for Green LanternH is for HobbitsI is for IntelligenceJ is for Jewish and proudK is for KoothrapaliL is for Lost in translationM is for My spotN is for New neighborO is for Obsessive compulsiveP is for PhysicsQ is for Quantum mechanicsR is for RoverS is for Saturnalia miracleT is for Time machineU is for UnderstatementV is for Virgin Cuba LibreW is for WaitressX is forY is for YamulkeZ is for Zinger
Monty Python's Flying AlphabetA is forArthur "Two Sheds" JacksonThe Amazing Kargol and JanetAnd now
the punch lineArt criticsA Little Later, Ltd."Adopt, adapt and improve"A TreeAnteatersArchitect SketchAftershave lotionThe Attila the Hun Show"Another strange line"Arthur Figgis, village idiotA Sniveling Little Rat-Face GitAnn Haydon-Jones and her husband Pip"Are you the brain specialist?"B is for"Black balling bastards!"BarristersBicycle Repairman"Brandish the raspberry!"The Big CheeseBurglarBlancmangesBaby snatchersThe Batley Townswomen's GuildBetsBocialistBoncentration BampsThe BishopThe Buzz Aldrin ShowBobbiesBlackmail"Bra-vo"Bruces"BURMA!"Bing Tiddle Tiddle BongBrian and BrianetteC is forChartered accountantsConfuse a Cat, Ltd.Clock smugglerCrunchy FrogCamel spottingThe Colonel"Cuidado las llamas!"CrossdresserChief Superintendent Look-Out (of the Yard)Choc icesCharles Compton, the stripping doctor"Camp it up!"Conrad Poohs and his dancing teethConquistador
From the NorthCHAPTER FOUR~My knowledge of a mythical world actually being in existence made life with the Cullens easier. At least for them. They kept no secrets, never talked in whispers, and were never shocked to see me out of my room come midnight.But that didn't mean it was any less awkward for me. I still marveled that I was living with a bunch of vampires--albeit "vegetarian" ones--and Bella still bothered the heck out of me. Perhaps doubly so since I knew what she was and she wasted no breath discussing what it might be like once I became a vampire as well.I'd have punched her in the face if I had thought it would do any harm, but I stayed my hand and left her jabbering at Renesmee.Again, I sought out Carlisle who was in the front yard talking to a shirtless, tan-skinned young man. They both looked very serious and I was hesitant to approach.The shirtless one noticed me and smiled."Don't be afraid," he said. "I won't bite."I joined them, saying, "That's not exactly my initial worry."
A Series of Unfortunate ABC'sA is for Aunt JosephineB is for BeatriceC is for Cafe SalmonellaD is for Daily PunctilioE is for Esme Gigi Genevieve SqualorF is for FortuneG is for Geraldine JulienneH is for Hotel DenoumentI is for Incredibly Deadly ViperJ is for Justice StraussK is for Klaus BaudelaireL is for Lousy LaneM is for Memento MoriN is for NeroO is for OlafP is for Pinstripe suitsQ is for Quigley QuagmireR is for ReptilesS is for Sugar bowlT is for ThirteenU is for Uncle MontyV is for V.F.D.W is for Wide WindowX is for XenophobiaY is for Yoil!Z is for Zombies in the Snow
ABC's of Harry PotterA is for Avada KedavraB is for Butter BeerC is for CharmsD is for DumbledoreE is for ErisedF is for Forbidden ForestG is for GryffindorH is for HogwartsI is for Imperious curseJ is for James PotterK is for KissL is for LumosM is for Ministry of MagicN is for Nimbus 2000O is for Owl postP is for PatronusQ is for QuidditchR is for Room of RequirementS is for SnapeT is for Triwizard TournamentU is for Unlikely heroV is for VoldemortW is for Whomping WillowX is for Xenophilius LovegoodY is for YaxleyZ is for Zonko's Joke Shop